Looking Out My Back Door

The Adventures of Spunky Bastard (Part II)

Today I did something that just might take some of the spunk out of Spunky Bastard...brought him to the vet for neutering and de-clawing (front claws only). No more will he climb up the inside of the screen door...slash the bag holding my lunch (then eat said lunch)...scale the heights of my wicker lingerie chest, then wreak havoc on closet shelves.

Of course, this doesn't mean he won't continue one of his newest tricks. I went to Bed, Bath & Beyond to buy one of those over-priced stainless-steel cylindrical garbage cans, with foot-operated lid, as Spunky B. was happily frolicking in the uncovered garbage. He wasn't happy. He first showed his displeasure by slashing at the exposed part of the can liner, expertly shredding the plastic and scattering it around the kitchen. Not long after that, he managed his best trick to date. One evening, I had disposed of the remains of a steak dinner, then returned to the kitchen a few minutes later. All of a sudden, BANG! The lid of the garbage can flew open, and up popped Spunky, like a little jack-in-the-box, a piece of steak hanging out of his mouth! Yes, now he knows how to pry open the lid, the little bugger. Lack of claws won't stop this from continuing.

This past weekend, as he was shredding the outside of an unpacked box in my bedroom at 6 am (trying to get me to feed him), I just smiled and thought, that's the last box you'll be destroying, you little shit. I crooned a little ditty to him, a special little number I came up with just for that weekend: "No more balls...no more claws...no more balls...no more claws."

In about an hour, I'll be able to call the vet to see how Spunky B. tolerated the surgery. That is, if my vet wasn't eviscerated by Spunky in the process ("You're doing WHAT to me? Here's my Puss-in-Boots imitation! SLASH"). Even though he's a Spunky Bastard, I'm rather fond of the little guy. I just hope I don't have to change vets.

posted by Hopster @ 10:44 AM